If Dad’s Not Home

Here’s a little shout out to the single parents, the parents who work opposite schedules, the military families, and basically anyone who has ever had to juggle the craziness of life and a babe on their own at any point in time. Recently Sam was out of town for a work trip and it was our first time apart since Brantley was born. He was gone a mere 48 hours (I know, that’s like a blink of an eye) and we made it through but of course not without a little adventure.

Most mornings, with the exception of maybe 3 days in the last year, both boys are still sleeping when I leave for work in the morning. This means I’ve only had to get myself ready before heading out the door. A typical morning looks something like this: wake up to my fifth alarm going off and the dog whining to go out; shower real fast; make the coffee; find a matching outfit that I hopefully didn’t wear the week before; pour myself a cup of coffee that I take maybe two drinks of; do my hair and make up; find an outfit for Brantley; kiss Sam goodbye; search for my car keys before remembering I left them in the car; get in the car; realize I left something in the house; grab that something and finally leave before getting stuck behind the bus that has a million stops on my route. Remember, this madness happens when Sam is home.

When Sam isn’t home: wake up to my fifth alarm, a whining dog and a toddler waking up; shower real fast before the babe starts screaming for momma; find those clothes even though I know we both definitely wore the same thing last week; make the coffee; get the babe from his crib and grab a few toys; lock ourselves in the bathroom while I get ready; pick the hair dryer up off the floor and put it away since it’s now become a toy; calm a near meltdown because we have efficiently brushed our teeth for five minutes and have to put the toothbrush away; put my coffee in a to-go mug; grab a granola bar; calm another near meltdown because he didn’t get his own granola bar; find his blanket to help with the meltdown; grab the lunch meat, cheese and bread to make my lunch at school, no time for that at home; figure out how to carry everything plus the toddler to the car; leave the coffee on the counter, I’ll stop and buy some; throw on some shoes and put Brantley’s shoes in my bag; make it to the sitter where he jumps out of my arms; stop at McDonald’s for coffee and wait 10 minutes while I watch all the employees fix the ice cream machine at 6:55 a.m.; make it to work with 30 seconds to spare and find the babe’s shoes in my bag.

Oh and night time? Check to make sure all doors are locked at least 5 times; decide locked doors and a doberman aren’t sufficient enough security; move a chair under the front door knob; decide that’s still not enough; move the ottoman under the door nob, too. Run up the stairs after turning off all the lights but one because obviously a light on through the night (when there’s usually not) means, I’m definitely not home alone. Fall asleep watching HGTV because anything else would probably make me have wacked out dreams.

Let’s be honest, my brain is a little more chaotic than most. I would like to think I would get in a flow if I had to do this often but I thank goodness I don’t.  Major kudos to those of you who do. If you can balance all this and maybe even add in a second child, you should pour yourself a large glass of wine and run for president. 😉

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